To question a defense.

Everyone is born with specific defenses. When something irritates or threatens your eye, you blink. When something itches on your skin, you scratch it. When someone makes you angry or poses a threat, you first defense usually is to raise your voice. The defenses I question today are emotional. Now I'm aware of the fact that if a certain situation affects you in a negative way, you learn from it and adapt so that it may not occur again. I question why we allow dramatic events to mold our futures? For example if a young lady has one or a few bad relationships and decides men are all the same then swears off the gender for good. Can the kkk depict all Caucasians? Does Flavor Flav describe all African Americans? For another example, A 68 year old women goes out for a walk and is struck by a car. She survives the hit, but decides never to leave her home again. Does her stove not create fire? Can a car not drive through her home? My point is that there are certain things we can never escape. Pain, danger, emotional upsets are all apart of life. Since we know we cant outrun a train we don't try, so why do we work so hard to escape the inevitable? The problem seems to lie with trust. The only thing we can trust now days is that these things do and will happen. How can we live with this knowledge and still continue on? How can we defend against our defenses? Please leave answers or situations resulting in these actions for discussion.